The Beauty of Working Out – Social Bonus

So as you have most likely inferred from my previous post, I am back in the gym.  Gym time is sort of therapeutic, I think it didn’t start out this way.  Scratch that, I know it didn’t start out this way.  For me, going to the gym started as almost like a self punishment for gaining weight.  It was a big “hey stop gaining weight, OR ELSE!”  But the gym isn’t terrible, it isn’t a punishment.  In honesty going to the gym is a treat to yourself.  Simply having the affordability to get a gym membership means you have some sort of reliable income. You have essentially outed yourself as a working class citizen if you have access to standard gym facilities.  Maybe you have access through your job, or maybe a friend.  The local YMCA isn’t a bad place to work out either.  If you have access to a gym, take advantage of it!  Tell yourself that you are one of the wealthiest people on earth because you have access to health.  Going to the gym is healthy.  Not just because people smarter than you or I say “Eating right and working out are key to a long life.”  But because spending large quantities of time indoors gaming in a dimly lit room have taken its toll on your social qualities.  I say “social qualities” instead of “social life” because, you are social.  Any active member of a gaming community knows they are social, more social than most people they have had to interact with in a non-digital format.  But there are problems even in that.  You can’t prove to anyone outside of your gaming world that you are actually a social person.

Going to the gym forces social interaction. You are probably thinking “no it doesn’t, I’ve been to the gym and never said a word.”  Go to the gym more broseph.  Take notice as you walk in and have to interact with the person behind the desk, you hand over whatever credentials you need and they scan you in, tell you to have a nice workout and go back to being white noise.  Take notice of how you casually ask a random stranger “are you using that machine?”  You are being social in a public setting, outside of your normal comfort zone.  Why am I bringing this up?  Because gamers in general tend to be “socially awkward.”  At least that is the perception by other people.  What you find as normal, others find as weird.  You’re not weird, you just aren’t fluent in the language of “point blank social interaction.”  Perhaps, this is the reason you may get asked “when are you going to get a girlfriend/boyfriend?” or maybe you are told “if you spent less time on that game blah blah blah.”  Being right in front of someone and being personable doesn’t come naturally, it doesn’t have to come naturally.  But it is useful to develop this skill.  At one point I would definitely describe myself as socially awkward, because I was.  Maybe to this day I am a little awkward, but I have made strides to be more social in public.  Online I am my character, or I am my persona.  Maybe that’s the real me, certainly that’s how the real me thinks but maybe I talk a little different.  In public I am more withheld, more compromising.

People like nice people.

 Most gamers aren’t really what I would call “nice.”  Gamers tend to be honest, not nice.  You can’t find “nice” in a talent tree.  Nice does not stop a reaper from killing your probes.  It’s not that being nice is an exceptional quality needed for gaming but it is pretty cool in life. Being nice isn’t all about being fake.  It seems fake at times, but it is more about saying things in a manner that doesn’t give a reason for a response.  “Kill them with kindness” is something that I have heard before and never thought twice about the possible applications for this saying.  I couldn’t tell you how many times I have had that “get a girlfriend” conversation but it was more than enough.  MESSAGE RECEIVED, YOU THINK I WILL DIE ALONE, GOT IT. I responded typically with attempts to dodge the conversation entirely.  Never works.  After developing a method to respond calmly and make it sound like I was agreeing, the conversations seemed to die down, cease even.  Of course I have had several relationships and I am now married.  So somewhere along the line I have become pretty dope at switching between my more abrasive self and the calm social individual who is approachable.

You are already your best self, be social enough to tell people about it!

-Arrogancy, Chubby Gamer

Chubby Gamer – What?

What is Chubby Gamer?  Chubby Gamer is You! It is me, it is a dedication to all the people out there living an awesome digital lifestyle.  It is also dedicated to the 1/3 people you will run into who, while completely awesome, are suffering from Obesity overexposure to ones own awesomeness.  Yep, you gamed perhaps a tad too hard and you put on a little “love” weight.  This is where you belong, this is your home.  This is that place you can go and not be judged for being so awesome.  This is Chubby Gamer, this is You!

So, on August 1, 2015 I decided to finally pull the trigger on making a website.  A website where I could get my thoughts out.  A place where I could vent frustrations about bad game design and why the number on my scale keeps going up. I also wanted a place where I could just be honest. If you are a “hardcore” gamer, it goes without saying your family doesn’t get you, I get you bro, I get you.  So I came up with this website and then I never made it happen.  I’ve had this idea floating around in my head for the better part of 8 years.  Why didn’t I get around to it until now?

Because, Internet.  

There is at least a million excuses as to why I didn’t do this sooner. I guess if I could narrow down the two most pressing reasons it would be Money and Time.

DISCLAIMER: I am about to text crit you for over 9000

Money: Things in the world cost money and if I were to spend the money I had on a website then I couldn’t spend it on other things.  Other things include several years of World of Warcraft and Fully Loaded Nachos from T-Bell.  OH. MY. GOD!  T-Bell, why you so good?  Sorry, trailed off there.  Money takes us places we can’t go, lets us see things we can’t see and do things we can’t do.  I used my money to kill dragons on the internet, ‘kay?  Being honest with myself, and with you the reader, I’ve never made quite enough money to fully support my gamer habits.  Typically spending my tax return to fund a new computer build; using my bi-weekly paychecks to scrape by until the next person calls my phone asking me to “fix” their computer.  Ebay’ing old junk because I just didn’t feel like using Craigslist.  Money was tight, tight enough that when everybody was getting the latest and greatest in console gaming, I was busy trying to convince people: “there is just too many games I haven’t beaten yet on PS2.”  I was more of a PC gamer anyways, so I always made sure to have all of the best components that were 1-2 years old.  You know, that “sweet spot” where they have “worked all the bugs out.”  I also spent my money on getting in “shape.”  I got a gym membership at my local LA Fitness, $60/month for a membership to a gym that is all over the country!  I can work out anywhere I want!  I kept this membership for 3 years, I used this membership about twice a year.  I told myself I would go to the gym, tomorrow.  Of course I also had all the normal expenses of an adult; bills, car maintenance, Netflix, school, entertaining a significant other, over priced cable internet, whatever else.  Money will always factor into adult decisions somewhere along the line and you end up making certain choices, in my case I put off this website.  If you want to know what changed with my money, I will say “basically nothing.”  I still don’t make enough money to do all the things my heart desires but I am a bit better with my budget and as such this website has become a reality.

Time: Ever moving and you never seem to have enough of it.  Time isn’t cool and it isn’t your friend.  You get older with time and stuff happens to your body that makes you look odd and you start growing hair in weird places…  WTF TIME?  WTF?  I never seemed to have quite enough time.  I used to work 8-10 hours a day for a new defunct company that shall not be named.  That meant the second I got home I had to figure out food and then log on.  I would spend the next unaccounted for hours gaming so hard people wished I didn’t game so hard.  I would follow this up with passing out and hopefully waking up to my alarm so I could start this process over.  I had a standard two days off a week, during which I would binge game and utterly decimate whatever “sleep schedule” I had established.  The next day I would have a mostly liquid lunch comprised of whatever energy drink I was into at the time.  Eventually, I was so good at not sleeping I got promoted in the unmentioned company and got paid less money per hour to do more work.  I went from around forty hours a week to seventy, this really cut into my gaming.  To make up for it I took it upon myself to sleep less and game even harder than before.  I typically slept about four hours a night several days in a row and then randomly pass out and sleep for around 12.  I wouldn’t suggest it.  As I mentioned earlier, I had a gym membership so sometimes when I wasn’t busy I would go and do gym stuff.  Gym stuff was really hard because I was at work so much and had to game so often that I just couldn’t make it to the gym.  Around this time is when I cut off my LA Fitness membership.  It felt like a smart move in at the time, because I needed more money for doing whatever it was I wanted to do and I needed the time to do those things in.  So eventually I got to the point of zero work/life balance and never really had time to do much of anything. at one point during all of this I even got kicked from my raiding guild in World of Warcraft.  It was really depressing for a while there knowing how hard I was trying to do everything that I got nothing done.  Eventually, along with some friends I had in my old guild, we made a new guild that was better and stuff.  This allowed me some much needed flexibility.  I was able to just not raid if I didn’t have the time and not worry about being /Gkicked for having to deal with real life.  I was slightly happier for a time because we I was able to enjoy killing internet monsters and getting purple pixels splashed upon my screen almost at will.  Of course all good things come to an end and our guild stopped raiding for various reasons.  Time, being the cruel mistress that she was, seemed to open up to me at this point.  Retracing my personal timeline; I lost my guild, I lost my job, I lost my somewhat of a girlfriend. I had lots and lots of time on my hands.  This website should’ve been made right then but I felt depressed and didn’t want to do anything.  I spent the next two weeks on my couch.  I didn’t answer my phone for about a month.  I didn’t want to have human interaction with anyone until my brother-in-law text me saying “are you OK?”  When I finally came up for air I sent a mass text message to my family saying “Hey, I am alive. I am eating from time to time. I even sleep sometimes.”  At that time I looked in the mirror and decided that I needed to get myself together and get at least some part of my life back.  So, I joined a gym. I re-entered the society that I loathed so much.  It was fortunate that I was able to join a gym that my family was going to and it helped me stay accountable.  I had always been a “big guy” but I had ballooned up to about 280.  I had done the whole “weight yo-yo” thing before and always came out on the losing end.  This time in particular I was losing big. Double entendre, roll on snare, big laugh.  I had gained all the weight I wasn’t looking out for and I needed a change.  I had a new found commitment to losing weight and I lost a ton.  I spent the time I was spending at work, in the gym.  This borderline obsessive behavior was fueled by rage, because all the things that threw my life out of whack were gone and I wanted them back.  Not because they were good for me but because I thought they made me normal.  As a result I lost a pretty good amount of weight at a rapid pace.  I started doing more and more IT work and I felt the pressure of not having enough time being lifted from my shoulders.  I returned to gaming, finding a new love for the MOBA genre.  I was social and happy.  Eventually, I started a new relationship.  It was difficult at first because it was long distance, but because of that luxury I also was able to keep my own hours.  My freedom allowed me to move from my home and continue a relationship with a woman who eventually became my wife.  Life was great, time didn’t exist.  I gained a bit of weight back because I left my gym membership a few states over.  At the time it wasn’t a big deal, the solution was easy, get a new gym membership.  In an absolutely awesome turn of events, I injured my back.  Back injuries are interesting because nobody knows exactly how much pain you are in daily.  I ruled out going to the gym, I gained all my weight back.  Time went full asshole mode on me.

Wow, that last bit was out right depressing.

Fast forward to today. My back is finally in a functioning state and I am energized.  I’ve been married a year and I have my first child on the way. I looked at my wife one day while talking about baby stuff and I just said, “I want to run with my kids.”  I haven’t wanted to run since before I hurt my back.  Running without a knife isn’t exactly a “gamer” thing.  But the idea of wanting to be able to keep up with your kids isn’t exclusive to me.  Lots of adults want this but don’t know where to begin.  I want Chubby Gamer to be a starting place.  Follow me on my journey.  If you feel daring, join me.  This is where you belong, maybe you’ve been looking for it all along.  Welcome to Chubby Gamer.

TL;DR Watch me work out and play games and stuff.

– Arrogancy, Chubby Gamer

Game hard, Train Hard